just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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