there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Randomize
