she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
