We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
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