All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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