I wannas sexs uuuuu
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
