Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
