im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
