apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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