ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I party with great urgency now.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
