so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
