He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
My liver just had a heart attack.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize