Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
