I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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