you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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