There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize