mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
