Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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