You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
