At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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