I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
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