VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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