We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
