Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
