I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
