therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
