If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize