Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
