What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
