Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
