also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
