I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
