apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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