I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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