Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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