i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
