If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
they're like a gay fantastic four
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
