he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
