you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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