And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
