tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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