It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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