OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
