we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Randomize
