2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
