i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
my poor anus
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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