I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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