never play flip cup with pint glasses
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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