We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Please don't give away my fajitas
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
