ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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