quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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