So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
